We survived the wedding and sort of made it through the end of the semester. I have to retake 4 of the 6 classes I took this summer. Despite medication, my crawling into a ball to deal with stress hasn’t seemed to stop. I’m moving in with Jennifer…it’s a process. I have so many things and I need to get rid of so many of them. If anyone knows anyone in need of some clothes (mostly medium-ish shirts and maybe some cardigans), I will be getting rid of a bunch.
I’ve been looking for places to take my stuff. I have a lot of stuff. I have a lot of stuff because I am a pack rat, and I refuse to get rid of things that I’ve worn once because I might someday be in the mood to wear precisely that one thing, and if I’ve gotten rid of it, all hell will break loose. (IT WILL. DON’T JUDGE ME.) I think that the technical term for me is moderate hoarder. Oops.
Anyway, I’ve been doing research. Here in Happy Valley, the trend is to always give things to the D.I. I’ve been giving my “old” (read: used maybe twice) stuff to the D.I. for as long as I can remember. But, I feel like I give stuff to the D.I. and then the people who get my stuff aren’t people who need things, but students at The Lord’s University who shop at D.I. to be cool. Boo.
So, I’m thinking about donating to a place in the Big City called Our Store, which accepts your in-good-condition-but-otherwise-gathering-dust-belongings and keeps them in their thrift store. Our Store’s mission is to foster self-sufficiency among the community of people living with HIV/AIDS. I feel much better about donating my shtuff to a place like Our Store than to the already-crowded closets and jewelry boxes and living rooms of TLU students.
Speaking of donating, I have also been looking for ways to donate my time because *drumroll* I QUIT MY JOB! I’m still a little freaked out about it, but it needed to happen. After three years of high-stress and little sleep, I am going to have a slightly-more-normal schedule and not spend my nights cleaning tables. Not that there is anything wrong with cleaning tables. I didn’t leave because I hated the work. I love the work. I hate the drama. And I felt a huge burden dissipate when I walked out the door last Friday after my final shift. So, naturally, I have to find something else to immerse myself in. My thoughts? Volunteering my time at…someplace.
I am really interested in volunteering at grief support groups for kids or at women’s/children’s shelters. And I know that I am not in a place mentally or emotionally where I am going to be able to handle that. So, I am headed up to the Big City to volunteer at the Pride Center. I think. I submitted an application. We’ll see what they say. It isn’t that I think the work will be easier, but that I will be better suited for it than I would be for support groups and shelters, at the moment. And it seems like a good way for me to connect with some of my LGBT*QIA community. I’m drifting about in Queer Blogdom, but otherwise have no connection to a non-straight community.
Jennifer is a great ally. But sometimes you need more than an ally, you know?
Anyway. Donating my stuff. And my time. For selfish reasons (so I don’t have to find places for things in my new space…so I can maybe make some friends), but hopefully my things and my time can benefit other people, as well.
I’ve decided to wait and take the GRE after graduation. As well as apply to grad school. This gives me more time to focus on just getting through my bachelor’s degree, and hopefully will result in better GRE scores than I’d get otherwise. I haven’t told my mom yet.
Speaking of not telling my mom, Mom wants to know why I’m not as Church-centered as I once was. She deserves an honest answer. Which probably means coming out. Not sure how to do that. But. Wish me luck?